[yasr_overall_rating]
Newlywed couple Ted and Tami-Lynn want to have a baby, but in order to qualify to be a parent, Ted will have to prove he’s a person in a court of law.
“Ted 2”, opening June 26th, finds Ted (again voiced by Seth Macfarlane) living his dream getting married to Tami-Lynn (Jessica Barth). Of course, in that stereo-typical blue collar way Hollywood likes so much, within a year they are fighting like, well, a woman and a bear. When Tami-Lynn and Ted decide to have a baby to help straighten out their marriage, Ted turns to his best friend John (“Marky” Mark Wahlberg) for help. These two geniuses break several laws and step way over the bounds of acceptable fan behavior (sorry Tom Brady) looking for a donor before coming to the most obvious solution. Finding a donor turns out to be the least of Ted’s worries as the state of Massachusetts has him declared property, not a person, nullifying everything from his marriage to his Discover card. In steps the inexperienced lawyer Samantha Jackson (Amanda Seyfried), who completes the trio of pot smoking misfits and provides just the right amount of naiveté, not to mention a colorful set of bongs. She attempts to prove that Ted is in fact a person, not just some piece of property. The evil and jealous Donny (Giovonni Ribisi) makes a return as he tries his best to destroy Ted and John’s friendship. All the major players end up at New York Comic Con for an epic nerd throw down with Donny and a very angry Flash Gordon (Sam Jones as himself).
“Ted 2” never really veers away from what is expected of it. The jokes come fast and furious, some tame, some crass. I found myself laughing when I didn’t want to laugh, wincing from time to time, and turning away from the screen during one particularly disgusting scene. All of this is just another night’s work for creator Seth MacFarlane. Those familiar with his work already know what’s coming because his fingerprints are on every frame. I will give him props for being creative enough to find new ways to offend and mine the very depths of bathroom humor. That creativity will make this film a lot of money and make a lot of critics howl.
Wahlberg still seems out of place in a comedy. He never really finds the timing necessary for his jokes to ring true. His dimwitted John mopes through the film, lamenting over his broken marriage to Lori (Mila Kunis, who does not appear in this film) and ignoring the many women who keep throwing themselves at him. Jokes are associated with each of these encounters, but they mostly set up arguably the best joke in the film, which is directed at Seyfried’s character, Samantha, in a diner scene later in the action. Wahlberg redeems his performance a bit in the last 25 minutes as John pulls the greatest, and cruelest, practical joke in the history of cinema. Each actor pulls this scene off to perfection. I couldn’t help but wonder, however, why this two time Oscar nominee had such a hard time involving his character more in the comedy instead of simply being pulled along by Macfarlane’s teddy bear. I expect more from such a talented actor.
Seyfried plays her Sam Jackson with equal parts law school savvy and law firm intern insecurity. Then there’s all the pot she smokes, because she gets “headaches.” She’s given the case because her uncle won’t take it, and he wants her to get the experience. Ted and John give her the case because she smokes pot. She does as much as can be expected with the material in that she rolls with the jokes and enjoys the fun along the way. A stop at the library gives her, John and Ted a chance to tip a hat to “The Breakfast Club” while studying up for trial. The best parts of Sam’s character come from scenes like this and her penchant for finding the only bong John would absolutely not smoke from.
The cameos really shine throughout this film. Liam Neeson hilariously sends up the “Trix is for kids” slogan in a scene in the checkout line at Ted’s store. Patrick Warburton and Michael Dorn play against type as a gay couple at Ted’s wedding. Be sure to watch for their costumes later as they attend New York’s Comic Con. Sam Jones gets to play himself once again. He shows more comic range as he moves fans through the line at Comic Con than Wahlberg does the entire film. Finally, the inimitable Morgan Freeman makes an appearance as a jaded civil rights attorney. Not only is he great because he’s Morgan Freeman, but he gets to be the character who sums up the one moral truth present in the film. Today’s Supreme Court ruling legalizing gay marriage will only help the message here.
The end feels out of place, though. It was hard to take this message of respect and humanity seriously after an hour and a half of bodily fluids flying all over place and women being constantly objectified. I know, Macfarlane will say it was all in good fun and simply reinforced the point. I disagree. Most of it was in good fun to be sure, but some of it was unnecessary and relegated many female bit characters to sexual objects. This aspect took away some of the fun for me. I’d think I were taking it too seriously, but the fact is “Ted 2” takes itself too seriously, a flaw that is not entirely fatal, but is surprising given Macfarlane’s penchant for unflinching excess.
In theaters June 26th
