After Santa Claus – Code Name: RED ONE – is kidnapped, the North Pole’s Head of Security (Dwayne Johnson) must team up with the world’s most infamous bounty hunter (Chris Evans) in a globe-trotting, action-packed mission to save Christmas.
The discussion about what constitutes a holiday movie has gone too far. The erasure of boundaries on what makes something holiday-friendly started with the popular Die-Hard-Is-A-Christmas-Movie discourse. In a sort of Tumblr-era moment, the internet inspired the discussion of what else constitutes a Christmas movie: movies with Christmas scenes, movies with Christmas releases, movies with Christmas characters. The list expanded and Hollywood took notice. Enter “Red One.” Indeed not the worst possible thing to come out of the discourse but clearly a byproduct of the ‘anything can be a Christmas movie if you give it enough tinsel’ conversation. This mashup of Santa lore and spy adventure movies fits neatly in Dwayne Johnson’s filmography, sometimes hitting its very goofy mark. Still, the occasional drifts into weirdly adult territory turns the film into a mishmash of tones so stark it never quite sticks the landing.
The Rock stars as Cal, Santa’s #2 bodyguard, on the eve of his retirement. When Santa Claus (played half like a military sergeant and half like that male figure people are constantly trying to impress by JK Simmons) gets kidnapped, Cal has to track him down and save Christmas. He enlists the help of Jack O’Malley (sort of boozy semi-New York accented Chris Evans), hacker-extraordinaire, to wade through the world of magical monsters and find the world’s best kept secret. Together they’ll meet the Headless Horseman, evil snowmen, Santa’s evil brother Krampus, and even Nick Kroll! Along the way, Cal debates his retirement, Jack gets close to his son, and we all learn that we can be a little less naughty if we try.
“Red One” clearly places its audience among the young boys who want action movies and tired parents willing to drag the whole family to something if it means roughly two hours of peace. It leans in heavily to all its quirks and gimmicks and I have to admit I appreciate when its trying for profound Santa lore. Someone out there found a way to successfully market a litany of toys (rock ‘em sock ‘em robots, Hot Wheels, and the Nintendo Switch), SUVs, and sports cars. Its not for lack of funny one-liners and beat-em-up fight scenes. If anything, it’s exactly what its advertised as, so do not expect any more or less from a movie where Chris Evans wants to date a Wonder Woman action figure.
The movie’s at its best when its leaning into those beats. Whether its weird slap fights or toys come to life, the deft relation from action movie to Santa’s singular evening feels fun and silly in a way you can let go and enjoy. Then come the ‘spy’ moments. These tongue-in-cheek moments feel too self-flagellating to quite land. The five extra minutes this movie spends with Chris Evans rolling his eyes at The Rock’s one-liners is a total waste of time. It’s a movie about Santa Claus bench pressing over five hundred pounds. There is no room to poke fun at itself, and yet it does; mainly through Evans’ Jack O’Malley character.
Chris Evans truly is one of the most charming people on the planet. Even when he’s attempting a drunken lout of a father there’s a cheesy grin somewhere in the movie that makes you fall on his side. Perhaps its ill casting to make him such a bad character, but this movie works backwards from his ability to demonstrate joy and try to extrapolate misery from him instead. Unfortunately, direction must’ve been unclear as Evans’ weirdly Northern? New York? Boston? accent comes and goes throughout the film. That the Rock smolders, singes, and glares his way through every scene feels so utterly rote it takes the minute charisma of everyone else around him to make his scenes pop. J.K. Simmons literally sleeps through nine-tenths of the movie (that’s the point) and even Kiernan Shipka seems ill at ease as the evil Christmas witch.
“Red One” stretches the credulity of what audiences will watch. From the start it feels like a big-budget exercise in marketing rather than an actual movie. Someone, somewhere is telling a room full of executives they can make money off a movie if only they market it correctly, story be damned. While “Red One” leans into its goofy world, it stops all narrative momentum to poke and prod its story. Then there are the odd moments of adult humor.
If this were just an action movie for children, I could forgive much of the lighthearted fun and let it be, but this movie seems hellbent on being for adults too. Nothing jolted me more than the supermodels at Nick Kroll’s side in Aruba. I’m not usually a pearl-clutcher but the thought of going from fun Hot Wheels-turned-real to bikini-clad models felt so tonally jarring I found it unnecessary partially because it does degrade even these side characters but also that it simply doesn’t belong in this movie. Moments where Chris Evans makes the adult joke tear apart the childlike fabric of this thing and ultimately sink its finer seconds of wonder and awe. For some reason the longer this movie went on the more I noticed the swearing and while I get that action heroes have to be cool badasses something about this one felt like they should be using candy cane instead of shit or some such nonsensical thing. This movie’s greatest sin is not that it exists but doesn’t go all in.
When it comes to Christmas movies, its more about honoring the ethos of the holidays. The wild abandon and bright cheer are essential to light up our lives when the days are short. Sure, presents make us feel good, but knowing someone loves us enough to buy us something meaningful is half the joy. It shows they listened to us. It shows they care about us. As much as “Red One” proclaims to care about us as people, it sure doesn’t trust us to enjoy ourselves while the Rock and evil Santa slap each other silly. It has to give us an out and let us laugh at how ridiculous the whole thing is. Perhaps Dwayne Johnson and Chris Evans have a reputation to maintain, but its what’s holding this movie back. I get J.K. Simmons got all jacked for this movie, but if all three men will anchor a Christmas film, they must do it with utter abandon. In my book, even in higher resolution, this movie fits firmly on the naughty list because its too scared to care—a grievous sin.
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